A star of ITV daytime show This Morning posted a worrying video from her hospital bed, in which she admitted she has been “near death” at “multiple moments”. Expert Michelle Elman, 33, suffers from Hydrocephalus, a build-up of fluid on the brain which causes harmful pressure. She underwent her 19th surgery after being rushed in for an emergency op earlier this year.
Now Michelle has issued a heartbreaking statement via Instagram, telling fans: “Excuse my morbid mindset but it’s been five months of this [surgeries] and I think if I’ve learnt anything it’s that living a long life is overrated.
“There have been multiple moments where I’ve been near death or emergency surgeries and the last ting I said to my best friend, my dad, my sister whoever’s been out here before I’ve gone into surgery is I don’t want to live if I can’t do the things I love.”
She went on: “I want my brain and my body to work and if I’m confined to a hospital bed, I don’t want it and if this is all the time I have left then I am happy with that.
“Frankly I’ve had more time than I ever thought I would get because I thought I wouldn’t be here past the age of 21.”
Michelle admitted she’s unsure if she’ll “make it out of this”.
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She has already flatlined once, at the age of 11, and says she believes that death is “peaceful”.
Her illness has been described as “crushing”, with Michelle explaining: “I’m an adult, my brain can’t grow so instead it feels like your skull is crushing your brain.
“It’s now happened twice for me over three months, and you are just trapped in your body with no escape to the extent that when they cut into my body, water came out because it had nowhere to go.
“I’m not sure it’s moral for someone to endure that extent of trauma.”
If you have been affected by this story, you can contact the Samaritans, call 116 123, email jo@samaritans.org or visit https://www.samaritans.org/
